Photos by Caitlin Abrams
Stephanie March and the Snack Ship
Stephanie March: Captain of our Snack Ship
4 a.m.: Steph wakes up in a panic. It’s Snack Ship building day at City Center and she realizes the lefse sail is just not going to work: The snow shovel in a sand bucket jimmyrigged with coat hangers and sheet of lefse was, maybe, just a dream anyway. Commit to Let It Go.
8 a.m.: Drives around like a maniac to pick up beer and various snack foods while trying to get to City Center before the sandwiches arrive. Buying 35+ tin lasagna pans at once gets you a side-eye at Lund’s. WHY DON’T WE HAVE PEOPLE FOR THIS.
9 a.m.: FOX 9 Morning Buzz. Ali feeds the hosts Sweet Heat Skittles (we’re talking about Super Bowl branding, there is a method here) and nearly chokes on live TV. Bumps into Holly Robinson Pete, heading in to do The Jason Show. There’s an entourage. She smiles politely.
10 a.m.: Tunes are cranking at City Center while we construct a giant Viking ship out of Minnesota made snacks. A burger or two might have accidentally NOT made it on the ship, instead serving breakfast needs. Zoe Francois, nationally known pastry chef and bread star, shows up with a massive 10 lb. dragon head made of Cheerios, and we all suddenly wonder what we’ve all gotten ourselves into. We called out the big food guns, because it’s good to have professional stylists and chefs as friends: Molly Herrmann and Stephanie Meyer both agree this is the weirdest gig they’d ever worked on.
Noon: Throngs stop by some for free Heggie’s pizza, some for #snackship selfies, some to ask advice for what to make Jimmy Fallon for dinner (rhymes with dotdish). Some Fly-Eagles-Fly fans want to snap pics but tell us they are afraid to take their gloves off. They were also surprised how quickly their noses “froze shut." Two sportsbro Pats fans try to take our beer.

A group of photographers
If no one reported on government operations yesterday, it's because they were all at the JT press conference.
12:05: Arrive at the Super Bowl Halftime Show press conference. Security is nearly as tight as the airport with metal detectors and hands on bag searches. The crowd is…eclectic. Foreign correspondents, TV reporters in leather shorts and tights, Miss America. Lots of press people still bundled in parkas in the middle of the Hilton ballroom. We consider telling them that typically, we take our big down coats off while inside, but decide to let them overheat.

Justin Timberlake
12:15: Press conference starts precisely on time. We like how the NFL rolls. Justin might be taking this Man of the Woods thing a bit too far: his flannel is too big, too boxy. He seems as uncomfortable as we do when two different reporters insist on singing Happy Birthday to him. But they are quickly overshadowed by the Boston reporter who will not give back the mic until JT says Boston cream is his favorite donut. The Star Tribune’s Jon Bream sums up the softball questions best: No one asked about Janet Jackson!
1 p.m.: We hear that chefs Michael Mina, Charlie Palmer, and Adam Sobel will be at the Spoon and Stable stoves tonight, cooking a Super Bowl kickoff dinner with the New Power Generation playing post-duck grooves. Starting to realize a lot of things are happening without us.
2ish p.m.: Peyton Manning at Tanglen Elementary School! Al Roker ice fishing on Lake of the Isles! The stars, they’re everywhere! #superbowlcelebs
3 p.m.: Twin Cities Live appearance. Compare JT press conference notes with co-host Elizabeth Ries, who is trying to figure out what to ask Snoop Dogg later that evening. Snoop is everywhere! Co-host Steve Patterson says he’s working the red carpet at the Ditka event. Should we? Instead, we tell our Man of the Scene, Todd Walker.
4:20 p.m.: Peel into the Galleria parking lot and notice two town cars outside the Westin with drivers standing by. Consider asking who they are for, but decide we’re above that.
4:30 p.m.: Fitting for the Off The Field Players’ Wives Fashion Show, which Ali is co-hosting Friday with Grant Whittaker. One of the wives has claimed the dress Grant was planning to put Ali in, but he finds her another. Ali tells Grant to please make sure her dressing area is stocked with Lacroix and only La Croix on Friday, but he’s beyond laughing at this point in the day of sports wife fittings.
5 p.m.: The ice bar opens in the MartinPatrick 3 alley and we consider going…but we don’t. And then we feel bad when we see Instagrams of Minnesota Wild player Jason Zucker inside the store. Gosh, he’s nice.
6:30 p.m.: Steph says no. No to happy hour. No to celeb stalking. No to party hopping. She’s doing all that Friday night, so she needs to rest up. Gets in her car to make it home in time for dinner with the kid….but makes all the wrong traffic choices when a parking ramp exit is inexplicably closed. Thinking she could just sweep down the East side of town and avoid crossing Nicollet Mall (see armored tanks), she miscalculates and gets locked in grid. Too close to the Convention Center where flow goes to die. Ten feet in 30 minutes. Never mind that suddenly there are a LOT more giant black SUV’s with tinted windows and LM on the license plate, trying to muscle their way into the flow. She almost considered taking an exit to St. Paul just to get a breather before turning back westward, toward home.
7 p.m.: Former NFL wife turned influencer Landyn Hutchinson is holding one of her Hey Landyn….Live events at the Hutton House and it seems like a nice counterpoint to all the serious sports reporting we’ve been doing this week. Arrive just in time to snag a Crisp & Green salad (no there’s not bread, duh!) and hear Landyn, seated on stage on a white, fluffy couch, talking about the keys to a happy marriage. More than 200 women, with fresh blowouts, fur vests and heels, hold their rose in mid-air, riveted. We promptly start texting a play-by-play to friends (it’s basically note taking) and one responds: “Glad she is happy. I am not happy, because I had to buy a girdle. No joke. Had to lay down on the floor in Macy’s to zip it up.”
7:30 p.m.: We send an associate editor to the 13th Annual Legends for Charity® dinner at the Hyatt Regency because that feels like a place Super Bowl reporters should be, and because we recognize the names Pat Summerall and Tony Dungy on the press release. She gives us an energetic play-by-play: Packers pro bowler Mike Daniels comes out swinging big with a whopping $100,000 donation to St. Jude Children’s Hospital!
9 p.m.: We’re legit on the couch. In sweats. Definitely not going back out. Unless someone can get us in to JT’s listening party at Paisely Park. Can anyone? Or Sting’s concert for the NFL execs at Union Depot in St. Paul. Should we have tried harder?
9:30 p.m.: Texts start flying. It seems PitBull has rented a funeral home and plans to turn it into a concert venue. Are all Super Bowls like this?
9:35 p.m.: Videos show up on our iPhone. It’s Sting, in a striped short sleeve shirt, belting out Synchronicity II. He sounds amazing. No media at that event, but we know someone.
9:40 p.m.: Publicists are checking to see if we have thoughts on their events happening in late February. LATE FEBRUARY? Late February does not even exist this week. We are in the MIDDLE OF A SUPER BOWL.
10 p.m.: Something about an after party at Moxy. JT might show up. It’s not that we’re too old for this, just too wise.
10:30 p.m.: Reports from the Hewing Hotel. A friend has snuck in to a CAA party. She heard Aaron Rodgers was there. He isn’t. But Tim Tebow is.
10:35 p.m.: Receive an email with an invitation for a Friday party hosted by Jamie Foxx. We’re invited! We’re invited! Tomorrow is a new day.
If you missed Day 6, there were armored tanks and hot tubs.