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By Real Brides-to-Be
By: | Posted: 01/17/2011
The great news is my dress is ordered (Mori Lee), and we are progressing on the checklist! Yeah!
Every time I write a blog, Mike always offers to give his input, and since he did such an amazing job writing our Christmas letter, I thought it might be fun to hear a guy’s perspective on the wedding planning process. (Hint, it’s more than just smiling and agreeing with everything the bride says.) Who knew?!
The Groom’s Perspective (by Mike)
So the story goes that every girl has secretly been planning her “special day” since she was about 5 years old. At the same age, members of the male gender have probably been perfecting their alignment of army men for battle, or the proper trajectory for throwing dirt/rocks at their younger siblings.
This doesn’t mean that guys, at some point, haven’t thought about their wedding day. While most assume that all they can think about is a crazy bachelor party or the copious amounts of food and drink for their buddies at the reception, there are times when a guy has to think about what he wants to contribute to the wedding, and there are certainly aspects of the day where the guy’s perspective can be helpful, and even totally planned by the groom himself.
One of the bigger endeavors where joint decisions should be made is for the food selections. Each person can have different tastes, whether it’s the bride or groom or the guests, so it is important to have both of inputs on the dinner entrees. For our wedding, we wanted to make sure we had options of true Minnesota fare. Since all of my family is from the East Coast, many have not had the opportunity to try some of the finer Minnesota delicacies, such as walleye and true Minnesotan wild rice. (I have been secretly pulling for cheese curds, but due to the fact that they are really from Wisconsin and not very healthy for you, I figure we will pass.) I also suspect some of my family members aren’t huge fish fans, so the more typical meat options should also be available. You always want to be able to provide the usual meal for those who won’t venture far off the beaten path.
My biggest mission has been the planning of the honeymoon. Jen completely turned over the duty to me, and I have been diligent about trying to find the perfect vacation to celebrate our marriage. The two biggest points I had from the bride was she isn’t crazy about cruises, and she didn’t want to go to Mexico. I think she secretly has been hoping for Hawaii (where we met) but I’d like to go somewhere we both haven’t visited. I have been told by multiple married friends that all-inclusive is the way to go. The biggest plus is that you don’t have to worry about food, drink, or other fun activities having to come out of pocket once you get to your dream destination. I have been heavily researching different destinations in the Caribbean, because a tropical honeymoon is a great way to go and in the summer time you might be lucky to nab some off rates (since most people travel to warmer weather in the winter time). As soon as I set aside the big-picture plan of what I wanted, it was easier to research different companies and islands to get the best vacation for the best price.
And even though I inferred that the bachelor party wasn’t on my radar, my best man and brother, Matt, has been working hard on planning the perfect bachelor party, which to me would be a sports weekend in Boston. He is scheduling a group of us to go watch my favorite hockey team, the Boston Bruins, play our hated rivals, the Montreal Canadians. He wanted to do something unique for me and not fall into stereotypical Vegas weekend of debauchery . . . we don’t aspire to star in The Hangover, part II. It’s also a great location because it has a major airport, and as most of my friends are on the East Coast, it shouldn’t be too difficult to get up to New England to the Hub of Hockey.
So it is definitely important for the groom to get involved in planning too . . . not to mention it is a lot of fun! Jen has been great about letting me run with some ideas on my own along with working with her; it definitely gives the groom a feeling that he has a hand in the wedding too. That way, when those church doors open and your bride starts walking down the aisle, you will truly know it is our day and we planned it together!
Carly is manager, Social Media and Audience Engagement at MSP-C. See her engagement story.
Vanessa is creative director and co-founder at Bow & Arrow Magazine. See her engagement story.
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